some/thing blue

this is the last in the some/thing blog party series, and mine has focused on toys.



i got the idea to make a bean bag game for sylvan for his birthday, and i let cosmo try it out first. he enjoyed it so much, i made one for him. i painted the box all blue, because it is cosmo's favorite color. he likes it, but gets frustrated if he can't get the bean bag in the hole every single time.

carl and i have much more patience. we have had several tournaments of our own in the evenings after cosmo has gone to bed. first one to get 21 wins, but you have to win by 2. it is challenging, and surprisingly fun for us. something about the bean bag, it just feels good in the hand. cosmo always asks us to "opent it" because he loves to play with dried beans.

i have really enjoyed participating in this series. it has pushed me to post daily, and i've checked out a lot of the other participating blogs. hats off to robin at the other mother, for such a great idea.

some/thing borrowed

day three in robin's party, which, by the way, is in celebration of "freedom to marry week."

a couple of weeks ago we babysat our next door neighbor sylvan for part of an afternoon. it was the day after his third birthday, and so he brought over one of the presents he got: two toy monster trucks. cosmo and sylvan played with them a bit, and even had a little squabble over one of them, but ultimately sylvan was more interested in exploring cosmo's toy collection, so they were put aside. when sylvan's dad picked him up, they accidentally left them behind.

later that night, after cosmo was in bed, carl and i found ourselves setting up ramps with books, revving up the trucks and letting them loose to collide into each other. they are not the kind of toys i'd think to get for cosmo, but boy, did we have fun with them! these things are light and springy, with rubber tires, they climb walls and flip and crash.

it must have fulfilled some lost childhood fantasy of mine. i wasn't a super girly-girl as a child, but i didn't really play with cars and trucks much. i remember one time, getting a hold of a metal pick-up truck of my brother's, and playing with it all over the living room floor for hours. it sticks in my mind as this wonderful memory of discovering that something i wasn't used to playing with, that belonged in the domain of boys, could be really enjoyable. i've always carried around a slight feeling of regret, that i didn't do it again. well, not until my late twenties, when i worked construction and got to drive around a real live bobcat skid loader in the mud once in while.

we reluctantly returned the monster trucks to sylvan the next day.

some/thing new

the second installment for robin's some/thing blog party.

one of the gifts cosmo got for his belated xmas was a little people zoo. he got it from the same aunt who gave him a little people garage last year. the zoo is part of the next level in the fisher price collection, i guess, which means it has "educational value." there are 26 animals, each with a letter printed somewhere on its body. it comes with a mat, and various molded plastic zoo props. printed on the mat is a path with each of the letters of the alphabet, and a picture of the animal. when you press the A spot on the mat, it says "A" then, " Alligator begins with A" if you press it again, it makes an alligator sound. for animals that don't make recognizable sounds, like giraffes, there is a munching sound, or, for the x-ray fish, swishing water. there is also an image of water on the pad, which makes a splash sound when pressed.



my complaints about this toy are many. first of all, the design flaws: 1) most of the animals do not fit into the little alcoves carved out in the zoo structures (the jaguar, the one exception, is pictured above, peeking out of the "tree"). 2) if you line up all the animals in order, on the path on the pad, they barely fit, and it is almost impossible to use the animal itself (as intended) to press the button. this leads to mild frustration for two year olds. 3)the plastic waterfall is almost useless. animals don't slide down it in a satisfying way, and though it kind of opens, and animals can drop down into it, most of them get stuck. annoying. 4)there is a little perch on top of the main structure that opens up, but it's not clear why, and no animal can fit inside. the thing that bothers carl the most is that some animals have other little animals attached to them, but they can't be removed. for instance, there is a bird on top of the hippo, and the penguin has some baby penguins permanently melded to its body. this asinine feature is in keeping with the other little people, who have things like wrenches in their hands, or cell phones, depending on which set they came with.

as xta has already pointed out in her post from last year on the subject of little people, these figures are fat. the animals are chunky and, in my opinion, overly cute and cartoony. they don't teach the child much about animal identification. it's not that i think all representations in a child's world of objects should be realistic. i really appreciate a lot of the abstract and imaginative renderings in many of the children's books we have, and cosmo's favorite plush toy is a piece of toast with arms, legs and a big toothy grin. but i really believe there is more value in playing with animal figures that look like animals instead of marshmallows with smiley faces. case in point: ostrich. one of the most important features of an ostrich, for distinguishing them from many other birds, is their wacky proportions. they have these rather large bodies, stretched out necks, tiny heads, and long skinny legs. not according to fisher price. just take a look at their version of an ostrich. sorry to belabor the point, but an ostrich does not have short chubby legs--by definition!



cosmo has another collection of animal figures that justin gave him last year. they are much more realistic, and cosmo has enjoyed many hours of play with these, and, i'm sure will continue to incorporate them into his "work" for years to come. as a comparison, here is the ostrich from that collection. it looks kind of like an ostrich. weird.



for his part, cosmo likes the little people zoo just fine. in fact, he plays with it a lot. he has tried to put each and every animal into the little tree alcove, and seems sad that only one of them fits inside. he likes the letter aspect of it, because he's into letters right now, and he's enjoyed arranging, directing and pretending with small figures for some time. but i feel certain that he'd like it just as much if the animals looked like...well, animals.

some/thing(s) old

robin at the other mother had an idea for a series of posts she's calling some/thing. anyone who joins in will write a post today about something old, tomorrow on something new, and the next day something borrowed, the final day, something blue. i like the idea of "community blogging," so i'll give it a go.

my series centers on toys.
we celebrated a late christmas, with cosmo's relatives in wichita falls. as usual, cosmo was inundated with new toys. i hate to be ungrateful, but i often don't agree with their choices, and it annoys that they don't consult with me, or if they do, they ignore my suggestions and get him something they think he should have. they all seem to be in competition to get him what will instantly become his "favorite toy." one of his aunts this year was fretting over what to get him, though she had already told me she had some of her old toys she wanted to pass on to cosmo because her daughter wasn't into them. i tried to tell her that those old toys would be perfect, and she should not bother to go out and get something new, but of course she did. i guess she doesn't think it's right to wrap used things in pretty paper. she gave cosmo 3 new toys, beautifully wrapped, and then off to the side, she handed me this cardboard box full of fisher price little people (and accessories) from the 1970's. how could she mistake the real treasure here!?!



cosmo likes all the stuff he got. at first i thought he liked the vintage little people best of all, but now i have to admit that isn't really true. it is true for me. when i hold those small, minimalist renderings of human beings, the guy with the green peg body, and the sort of balding head, i am taken back to my childhood in such a visceral way. it's as if these little bits of plastic are a part of me, due to the countless hours spent imitating and constructing worlds for the characters, in the yellow trim house we had for them. cosmo's aunt gave us items that i didn't have as a child, (a wind up music box ferris wheel, for instance) but they still feel familiar to me. the graphics are the same style as the yellow trim house, and i wouldn't be surprised if one of my friends had some of this stuff. the ferris wheel doesn't work reliably, but it is still a lot of fun, as are the buses, cars, and playground equipment. the buses have strips of thin masonite against the wheel axles, which produce a satisfying rattle, and make the people go "up and down," (just like the bus song). i believe i am even more appreciative of these relics from the past because i truly despise the updated versions of fisher price little people. but i'll save my tirade for tomorrow's post. in the mean time, you can check out what xta has to say on the topic.

cabin fever

since indiana has a proper winter, it is often too cold to spend much time playing outside. cosmo really needs physical activity every day, as i think most kids do. so, we enrolled him in a swim class at the YMCA, which he and i really love. he is learning to relax on his back, blow bubbles, and he paddles his arms and kicks like a pro.



cosmo has also invented his own form of daily exercise: he runs laps around the loop of rooms that we call home. i learned about the power of "broadcasting" from our friend jane, in houston, so i act as the announcer at a race track with the sole contestant being cosmo. i narrate his journey down the hall, round the bend, through the kitchen, across the living room and back to the hall. we sometimes count the laps, he'll often pause to jump over a threshold, plunk a few keys of the piano, or touch the bird poster.

this is a nightly, pre-bath activity, so as he makes his laps, various articles of clothing are removed until he is finally a naked streaker on the track. he loves this part the most, and will just keep running lap after lap, grinning, laughing, wearing himself out. for the final few laps, carl picks him up and he runs in air, "ladies and gentleman, our contestant is now airborne, he can fly! the crowd goes wild!" the whole affair concludes with a splash into the tub.

into the void

...Before I'd traveled half a block
i spied the needle Mother dropped
(mending my dress two nights before--
we'd searched for hours on the floor),
the card that always disappears
(we haven't played Old Maid for years),
pennies I'd carried in my shoes,
the silver dimes I always lose,
bread crusts I'd hidden, hard as wood,
the puzzle pieces gone for good,
things worn or wished on, old or lost,
roses astonished by the frost,
the snails and numbers, stars and sheep
my mother counts to fall asleep...

from The Tale I Told Sasha by Nancy Willard

we always seem to be losing things: a couple of cosmo's DVDs, countless marbles, mittens and socks, carl's favorite wool sweater "Ol' Greeny," which we eventually found. for a while, a Microphone's album was missing from it's jacket, but we discovered it later in another record sleeve. some of these things are obviously easy to lose, but a jar of honey? most puzzling is the medium-sized maple wood cutting board, which has been missing for a month. it's a small house, with not a lot of nooks and crannies, and we have searched every conceivable place it could be, on numerous occasions. where does a cutting board hide?

harmonious

cosmo spontaneously grabbed the harmonica as he took to the keys today. this was my favorite of the clips i shot.

if you haven't already, you can see more videos here.

downward frog

cosmo put these frogs in the downward-facing dog pose. it is one of his favorites. he puts his playmobile figures in this pose sometimes too.

cookie doh

as some of you know, i struggle with nostalgia. i am aware of its dangers, and i know to be suspicious of it when it pops up. but sometimes, i cave in. and having a child allows me to indulge in certain behaviors i had shunned in a previous time. things like celebrating xmas, for example. with cosmo i find that i want to recreate the warm and wonderful parts of my childhood. when i was pregnant, one of the first things i did was order children's books on ebay, from parent's magazine press from the 1960's and 70' s. books i had as a child. i also purchased a bunch of cookie cutters from a yard sale one saturday, with tish and michael, when i was 8 months pregnant. i was dreaming of making sugar cookies with my child, like i had with my mom. last year, i made cookies and crackers with those cookie cutters, and i just couldn't wait 'til the day when i could do this with cosmo.

that day came today. he helped every step of the way. he broke the egg into the dough, and offered to taste test throughout the process. he said he was scared of the mixer, but he didn't really act scared. he stuck with me. we put the dough in the fridge while he took his nap, and i told him as he was laying down that we'd be making cookies when he got up. the first thing he said when he woke up, rubbing his eyes, was "cookies." so we went right to it. i rolled out the dough, and he and i cut out the shapes, and put them on the cookie sheet. he has a stool to climb up on to see what we are up to in the kitchen, and he always wants to be in on it. he'll start dragging the stool over to the counter, saying "see! see!" he really loves to watch popcorn popping through the glass lid.



cosmo, naturally, loved the cookies, but he practices moderation, and we still have some left. i'm pretty sure he liked the process of making them.
for me, it was a dream come true.

white christmas

like last year, we traveled to denver to visit carl's family. we woke up on xmas morning to a fresh blanket of snow. it was so beautiful, and the snow kept falling for most of the day. cosmo helped carl shovel the driveway, and we did a little sledding in the street.

dominoes

cosmo kept saying "da-no" for dominoes, and we were getting confused, so i tried to teach him how to say the word. here's how it went...

mama: cosmo, say "dah"
cosmo: dah!
mama: ok, say "me"
cosmo: me!
mama: good, now say "no"
cosmo: no!
mama: great, now say "dah me no"
cosmo: mommy no!

funny how those words just roll off the tongue...

making marks

i've been giving cosmo more opportunities to express himself visually. we have a nice space in the workshop for him to paint, and in the house he works with markers, chalk and crayons. one day last week his drawing took a dramatic turn. he went from large open swirly-type gestures, to making small careful shapes and slow lines. i think it was a one-off, i haven't seen him draw quite like that since, but it was really interesting. maybe these examples demonstrate what i'm saying. the one on the left is typical of what cosmo does with markers.

musgrave love

our farmer's market is closed for the season, but they had a special scaled down version out at musgrave orchard just a few miles from town. we drove out on a frosty morning to check it out. there wasn't much produce available, (compared to the regular market) but it was nice to visit the orchard. we took home a bag of apples and i made this pie.



it was possibly the best pie i have ever tasted.

"two"

cosmo turned two on the day after thanksgiving. he was thrilled to have his beloved uncles ch. and h. visiting from houston. carl made his now-famous-pumpkin-bread in a cake pan, and we topped it with whipped cream and a few blueberries. i couldn't find the birthday candles, so we had to use some household/emergency ones i had in the cabinet. he managed to blow them out this year, i think. or, maybe i was too busy snapping photos to actually witness that for myself.

two also happens to be one of cosmo's favorite words right now. he pronounces it really well, and uses it to indicate most quantities larger than one.



two is also the number of fish oil tablets that cosmo gets to take each day. i was concerned that cosmo might not be getting enough omega 3, 6 & 9 fatty acids, which are said to be important for the developing brains of small children. so, i got him some fish oil supplements designed for kids. they are similar to a vitamin e capsule, and they burst in his mouth when he bites down on them. i tasted one, and it did not taste good. they have some lemon oil in them, but it does not mask the nasty fish oil taste and odor. surprisingly, cosmo LOVES these. he knows that he gets two, and he gets all giggly and giddy when we hand them to him, and chuckles as each one pops inside his mouth.
"how many do you get cosmo?"
"two! tee hee hee"
he refers to them as fish, asks for them every time he sees the bottle, and gets upset if we refuse (because he has already had them that day). luckily, offering a clementine instead is enough to get him to forget about them...for a little while anyway.

time for weaning

i've been wanting to write about weaning cosmo, but i also wanted to wait until i was out of the hormonal chaos that followed. i just looked back on a couple of journal entries i wrote in the midst of it, and decided that might be the best way to tell the story.

sept. 30 2007
sunday

it seems at though the time for weaning cosmo has arrived. i am having a lot of trouble letting go. i just don’t want to cross that bridge. it is so sad for me…sad in a way that i can’t quite articulate. it is not rational. i know he’s growing up, i know that the nursing relationship changed a long time ago, and i feel now that what little remains is holding him back. it is confusing and upsetting and unnecessary. the only reason we are still doing it is because of my fear of letting go. just now, when i thought of not nursing him for his nap tomorrow, i felt so sad, that today was our last nursing. i wanted to find another time to nurse him before that, so that could be our last time. i may do that, just to have one last time of looking into his eyes from that vantage point. a farewell. the end of an era. these kinds of transitions are always hard on me. i’ll get through it, but i need to honor my feelings, and spend some time reflecting.

later…

well i just spoke with christa about it. i called her. she was wonderful and perfect. i told her the story of when i stopped nursing cosmo at night. how he hugged me so tight for so long and we cried and laughed and he seemed to know what it meant. she suggested that i find some way to mark, and celebrate this moment. so, i was thinking that since i want to have one last farewell nursing, we could make it be something special and unusual. that way he won’t be confused, think we are going back to night nursing or something. maybe we could go out to lake griffy and take a walk in the woods, and i could just stop and sit down with him and nurse. i know i would love that, and i bet he would too. it would also probably be brief, since he’d be interested in other things.

oct.7, 2007
sunday

we went out to lake griffy that afternoon. after throwing rocks into the lake for a while, we headed into the woods, on one of the trails going up. when we got to the top of the hill, carl and i scouted for a nice place to sit. i chose a big tree to lean against. i sat down and invited cosmo over to nurse. he was surprised and enthusiastic. i held him across my lap and he had one eye looking up into my face. i remembered all those days and nights in the great green chair, when we were both new to all of this, and how overwhelmed i was with love for him. like nothing i’d ever known. this beautiful baby and me-- learning to trust each other, building this bond. the stillness…

i started crying--really all out bawling. carl was next to us, he was tearing up too. cosmo looked up into my face, i smiled at him, he smiled at me and then he reached up and touched my tears with his finger. he paused from nursing for a moment, and put his finger in his mouth, tasting my tears. then he giggled a little and latched back on. i laughed too, and cried a bunch more.

we were there under the tree for a good 20 minutes or so, then i got him interested in something else, and we easily transitioned out of our final nursing time together. i was so happy that we took the time to do this. i really needed it. i continued to be weepy about it all week, but cosmo seemed to be ok. he asked a few times, still asks occasionally, and i remind him of the time we took a walk in the woods, and nursed and i cried and he tasted my tears, and there were flickering leaves in the trees overhead that we both marveled at. he remembers, and he reenacts the scene. he does the sign for crying and says mama. he makes the sign for nursing and tears and then he puts his finger in his mouth to lick off the tears. it is so unbelievably sweet i wanna cry every time i think of it. he will sometimes just tell the story, spontaneously, other times, if he asks to nurse, i just say, “no, remember? we don’t do that anymore. remember our last time, in the woods?” and he’ll finish the story.

we hug a lot more now. i like that.

this picture was taken that day at the lake.

one of the most amazing changes since weaning has been how well cosmo sleeps, and how he falls asleep. he now falls asleep all on his own, in his own room, with the lights out, and the door closed. after his bath, we read stories and then he turns out his lights. he lays down and often says "night night mama." i kiss him goodnight and leave the room. we found that closing the door helps make it dark enough that he won't be distracted (it was actually his idea). at first he would walk up to the door and call for me a couple of times, i'd reassure him through the door, then he'd go lie back down. but after a week or so of that, he now just stays in bed and falls asleep. incredible. he has also slept for 12 solid hours for the past 2 nights, but i don't expect a trend like that to last.